Former Governor Rick Perry (words we sometimes wondered would ever be spoken) gave his thoughts on the current drive to allow the open carry of handguns in Texas.

“We license (encourage)  people (big money contributors to my campaign) to drive on our highways (get huge state contracts without bidding). We give (after they give through the nose) them that privilege (quid pro quo). The same is true with our concealed handguns (my presidential campaign) … I don’t want the bad guys (Democrats, Communists, and Independents) to know if I’m carrying (dumb as a box of rocks and corrupt). I don’t want to be the first person shot (to lose in Iowa) if something’s going down (I screw the pooch in another debate).”