No one will ever accuse Red of being svelte – but at least I try. At the Dyanamo match last night (a rousing 4-2 victory over the Red Bulls) a woman in the row in front of us was so fat that she broke the seat. Plop on her ample behind as the seat bottom gave way under her considerable gross tonnage. The kind of person you don’t want sitting next to you. Stadium personnel did an excellent job of responding to the calorie caused crisis and managed the situation in a professional manner. Red is not a fat shamer, but if you take up your seat and 27% of the seats on either side – do us all a favor and watch on TV.