Our Poor Idiot Governor Greg Abbott has made Red long for the days of our previous PIG Rick Perry who seems to have disappeared in DC. Abbott was recently spotted unleashing a tirade against the city where he has been sucking on the state teat for the last 20 some years while continuing to collect money from the massive personal injury settlement that he has spent the rest of his life ensuring that no one else would ever get. Speaking to a Tea Party crowd in Bell County, Abbott disparaged the Capital City.
“As I was coming up here from Austin, Texas, tonight, I got to tell you, it’s great to be out of the People’s Republic of Austin. As you leave Austin and start heading north, you start feeling different Once you cross the Travis County line, it starts smelling different. And you know what that fragrance is? Freedom. It’s the smell of freedom that does not exist in Austin, Texas. That said, with your senators and legislators, I can tell you that today, Austin is more free than it was before the legislative session began because the state of Texas passed laws that overrode the liberal agenda of Austin, Texas, that is trying to send Texas down the pathway of California.”
First of all, OPIG Abbott is all about local control until it doesn’t fit within his grand scheme. After all, this is the guy who wants to blow up the union as it has stood for more than 200 years, so that individual states have more control. But if a city in his state doesn’t tow OPIG Abbott’s hard Tea Party line – well that’s just undemocratic and must be squashed. What a complete and total hypocrite.
OPIG Abbott needs to clean up his own house before complaining about Austin. The state he supposedly leads has the second highest percentage of uninsured children, ranks number 4 for women living in poverty, number 44 for high school graduation rates, is dead last in percentage of people with at least a high school diploma (that explains a lot right there), dead last in spending on mental health (again explaining a lot), and near the bottom in people with retirement plans and financial net worth of households. And that’s just a few things. Texas ranks near the bottom in almost every category involving education, the environment, social welfare and standard of living.
So what can OPIG Abbott brag about? Where does Texas rank No. 1 among the states? Here’s where.
Highest number of uninsured people
No. 1 emitter of carbon dioxide
No. 1 generator of hazardous waste
No. 1 in executions
No. 1 in percentage of voting age population that doesn’t vote (why bother in Tea Party Republic of Texas)
But you know what, OPIG Abbott is right – the air is different when you leave Austin. It’s often filled with the smell of ignorance, bigotry, poverty, pollution, intolerance and untimely death. Not everywhere – but in way too many places. So OPIG Abbott, how about this? Why don’t you work on cleaning up the mess that you and your party have made of Texas over the last 25 years before you start talking trash about one of the most successful, prosperous, vibrant, fun and attractive communities in the entire country. Red knows you would tackle those issues if you weren’t so busy worrying about who gets to pee where and attempting to upset the constitutional order that has served our country fairly well for about 225 years. So once you have legally cemented LGBT bigotry and have torn apart the basic contract of the union, you might consider getting to work on making things better for the people you supposedly represent.
And one last thing, if you don’t like breathing the air in Austin, please resign and go get a real job. You won’t be missed.
Paradise in Hell 