Red’s NFL Picks – Week 13

Red was a mediocre 3-3 on the straight match-ups last week and is holding his own at 43-29 for the season.  The money line was tough on ol’ Red as he went 2-4 with his bookie.

Answer to last week’s trivia:  From 1923 to 2013, the Packers and Lions have played 22 games on Thanksgiving Day.

This week’s trivia: When was the last scoreless NFL game played and which teams managed to score zero points?

Your Nada Game of the Week: Vikings over Falcons.    Case Keenum could have been a Texan!  In fact he was a Texan – twice and managed to win two games coming in out of the cold to end the season in 2014. And the Texans did not even give him a second look in 2015.  Okay he was bad with the Rams in 2016, but who wasn’t?  Given a chance in Minnesota (because Sam Bradford is a particularly delicate flower – no knock on Sam but that’s the way it is), CK has flourished with 14 TDs, 5 INTs and a 96.7 QB rating.  And meanwhile in Texas, Tom “the Turnover Machine” Savage is playing out the skein with the Texans.  Oh, what could have been.  This week is a big challenge for the Vikings but they look up to it.  Given the firepower of these two offenses, Red likes the over at 47.5. Minnesota 30 Atlanta 27.

Your Zilch Game of the Week: Titans over Texans.  Despite having been clobbered (and that is putting it mildly) by the Texans in Week 4, Red will take the “improved” Titans giving up 7 to the floundering Texans.  Hopefully, Mrs. Red has something planned for Sunday so that Red doesn’t have to watch another whipping.  Tennessee 24 Houston 9.

Your Zero Game of the Week: Eagles over Seahawks.  Red thinks the Eagles walk over the depleted Seahawks and will gladly give up 5 points to any eager Seahawks fan. Eagles overcome the reverse triple time zone, hipster adjustment factor hex and continue their march to a No. 1 playoff seeding in the NFC.  Another loss for Seattle and they still will not be in danger of falling out of playoff contention – mostly because the Panthers or Falcons must lose this week.  Heck, even the Cowboys-OTNAs winner this week will be within striking distance in the NFC.  The Eagles only problem may be clinching the NFC East too soon and relaxing a bit.  Which – all-in-all is not a bad problem to have.   Philadelphia 35 Seattle 21.

Your Zip Game of the Week:  Patriots over Bills.  Why not?  Red has sort of avoided the Pats this season because it just isn’t much fun picking them to win and picking them to lose is – well, usually a losing proposition.  But every team deserves a gander from Red during the season.  Pats top rated offense looks unstoppable right now.  Nothing short of divine intervention would keep them out of the AFC title game but for their pathetic defense.  But this is the era of offense.  Take the over at a hefty 49 – unless the weather looks iffy – then take the under.  New England 31 Buffalo 20.

Your Skunked Game of the Week: Dolphins over Broncos.  A well deserved spot in this week’s Shit Bowl for two failing franchises.  Sometimes there is just no point in analyzing these things.  So Red will simply give the usual warning to hide the Drano, Windex, Tidy-Bowl and Comet lest ye be tempted to mix up a deadly Tequila and house cleaner cocktail at halftime of this doleful dung duel.  That said, Red likes the under even at a lowly 38.5.  Beat that!  Miami 14 Denver 9.

Your Big 0 Game of the Week:  Ravens over Lions.  There is a huuuge difference between 7-5 and 6-6 entering December.  The team that wins this one has a real potential playoff path.  The loser has to count on a lot going wrong for other teams.  Nobody is scoring much on the Ravens right now, so Red likes the under at 40.  Baltimore 17 Detroit 14.

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