Author Archives: Red from Texas

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About Red from Texas

I'm proud to be Red. I have lived most of my life in Texas and I love this place. Here are a few things you should know about me. 1. I am happily married and intend to stay so. 2. I live in a house that is older than you, unless you are really old. 3. I own 2 rifles and a shotgun. I think handguns are just trouble. 4. I have never killed a man, but have taken out some deer and hogs. 5. I was a good student, but never close to being valedictorian. 6. In no particular order I like the Houston Texans, San Antonio Spurs, Houston Astros, FC Barcelona, Tottenham Hotspur, Texas Longhorns and Houston Dynamo. 7. I hate Dallas but always have a good time when I go there. 8. I was a Dallas Cowboys fan for 26 years but declared that I was no longer a fan during the 1987 strike. 9. I don't own any pets. I like cats, and a good dog and I have met at least 3 of them in my lifetime. 10. I think the best part of Texas is west of I-35. 11. I own two pairs of cowboy boots, but don't wear them very often. 12. I don't have a pronounced Texas accent, but can affect one when needed. 13. My last meal would be fried shrimp with tartar sauce, a baked potato with all the fixins', a dinner salad with 1000 Island dressing, yeast rolls and chocolate fudge pie for dessert. 14. I'm an old Dad, but my children are none of your business. 15. I have two degrees from UT-Austin and somehow managed to fall in love with and marry an Aggie. 16. Most of my family are right-wing nut jobs but I love them anyway. 17. When I get to play golf on a regular basis, I shoot in the low 80's. 18. I don't get to play golf on a regular basis. 19. I think Fort Worth is the best town in Texas by a long shot. 20. I have a mean herb garden. Regards, Red P.S. Remember it's not a color, it's a state of mind.

The Most Exciting City in Texas

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Is . . . drumroll please . . . COLLEGE STATION?

The Fort Worth Star-Telegram reports that according to Gogobot – a “social media travel planning site”, College Station is the most exciting city in Texas.  Red always knew that he could trust social media to steer him in the right direction.   Red’s favorite – Fort Worth – finished a distant 23rd behind such cultural hotbeds as Beaumont and Killeen.  That pleasure-dome on the Brazos known to the world as Waco comes in third.  Here’s the Top Ten:

1. College Station

2. Austin

3. Waco

4. Amarillo

5. Abilene

6. Houston

7. Denton

8. Beaumont

9. Dallas

10. San Antonio

So round up the wife and kids, load up the SUV and head for a fabulous weekend in exciting downtown College Station – and let Red know if you can find it.

Sticking With the Astros Choke Watch

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Red’s lack of confidence seems to inspire them.

Astros are currently 2.5 games behind the hated Texas Rangers and 0.5 games ahead of the California Angels of Anaheim, Orange County, Los Angeles or the General Vicinity of Southern California.

Magic Numbers:

7 to clinch AL West – it still aint gonna happen

4 to clinch Wildcard Playoff spot – winning the last 3 would guarantee a Game 163. 

Today in Texas History – October 1

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From the Annals of the Early Republic – In 1837, John P. Borden opened the General Land Office in Houston.  Borden was a veteran of the Texas Revolution and was appointed by Sam Houston to be the first commissioner of the new land office. His most daunting task was to catalogue and preserve the many Spanish and Mexican land titles issued before the republic. Borden worked alone as he had no funding or employees to assist him.  Within months, Borden had  successfully acquired documents from all over Texas. He also registered and surveyed new grants. When the General Land Office moved to Austin in 1839, Borden transported almost 5,000 pounds of documents by wagon.

Image from the General Land Office.

Red’s Texas College Football Game of the Week

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This week Red features the oldest extant rivalry in Texas college football – the aptly named “Battle of the Piney Woods” between the Stephen F. Austin State University Lumberjacks and Sam Houston State University Bearkats.  Heading into the 90th meeting, SHSU leads the series 53-35-2.  SHSU has been the dominant team for the better part of a decade with a shot at the FCS national title in recent years.

Since 2007, the winner has hauled away a 21-pound solid tombstone shaped pinewood trophy that somewhat bizarrely displays replica pistols. The logos from both universities are engraved on the handle of the pistols above name plates that will display the outcomes of the contest for the next two decades.   Previously, a pair of Colt Walker Pistols were awarded to the winning team, but the pistols have vanished.  Perhaps, just as well.

The 12th ranked Bearkats roll into NRG stadium in Houston with a 1-2 record having posted a very respectable score in a closer than expected 59-45 loss to Texas Tech and losing a heartbreaker to an up and coming Lamar team 49-46.  They mopped the floor with pathetic newcomer Houston Baptist last week.  Look for the Bearkats to be loaded for bear with their powerful offense taking charge.  SHSU averages an astounding 635.3 yards total offense and 51.3 points per game.  The Bearkats rank No. 1 among FCS teams in scoring, No. 2 in passing offense and No. 10 in rushing offense.

In contrast, SFA comes in at 0-4 with the season lowlight so far being the 70-7 butt-whipping put on them by the TCU Horned Frogs in Fort Worth.  There really isn’t much to say as this really just isn’t a very good football team right now.  They could turn it all around with a win this big rivalry game – but Red isn’t going there.

Red calls it for the Bearkats over the Lumberjacks by a “We’re Leaving Early to Get a Cold One” score of 57 -13.  Let’s hope the roof is open.

Cruz Lines up Texas Tea Party Support – Big Whoop!

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The Houston Chronicle reports that Sen. Ted Cruz (TP-Texas) has lined up the support of numerous Tea Party denizens of the Texas Legislature.  Red is not sure how that is going to help him in Iowa where a decent showing is surely critical.  Cruz is currently staggering around in sixth place in most national polls, but ranges anywhere from third to sixth in Iowa.  Still, Red has to admit that even sixth place is an impressive feat for a politician that has NOT ACCOMPLISHED A SINGLE THING in his not quite TWO YEARS in actual elective office.  The Canadian-born Cruz talks a good game to his rabid base of right wing loonies, but he has yet to show much broader appeal.  Maybe that day will come now that Cruz has lined up the craziest of the inmates of the Texas Legislative Asylum.  With Tea Party favorites like Konni Burton, Matt Krause and Doug Miller backing him, Cruz is sure to rocket to the top.

But Cruz can’t match the endorsement chops of Ben Carson.  Carson, who looks more and more clueless with each passing minute, has snagged the coveted endorsements of Kid Rock, Roger McGuinn, Richard Petty and Mickey Rourke.  If that isn’t a lineup sure to sway the national consensus in Ben’s direction, Red doesn’t know what is.

Astros Choke Watch is Back

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After blowing it last night against the lowly Mariners, the Astros are now currently 2.5 games behind the hated Texas Rangers. But more importantly, are now 0.5 games behind the Somewhere in the General Vicinity of Southern California and possibly in Anaheim Angels for the last Wildcard spot.  This is first time that the Astros have been out of a playoff spot in over 5 months.

Magic Numbers:

8 to clinch AL West  – It aint gonna happen folks.

6 to clinch a Wildcard Playoff berth – Now needing serious help.

Could the Angels just lose a game every once in a while?

Wake Red Up for the 4th Quarter

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The long-term trend for college football games is just that – go to a game and you are in for the long-term.  The average length of an average college football game is creeping towards 3:30 with perhaps as many as 20 games this year stretching to an intolerable 4 hours.  If you think that’s bad, the problem seems to be descending to lower levels of the sport.  Red attended a high school game 3 weeks ago that lasted 3:45!  And they play 12 minute quarters.  That didn’t stop the first quarter from lasting an hour.  It wasn’t helped by the fact that the refs called 62 penalties including two when one of the teams was taking a knee to run out the clock at the end of the game.  Really?  Don’t get Red wrong, he likes his football alright, but who has 4 hours to waste on something other than golf?  The Wall Street Journal details the decline in timeliness of America’s still favorite sport.

As Red has said many times, “the best thing about soccer – 2 hours.”

Today in Texas History – September 29

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From the Annals of Bravery – In 1864, Sgt. Milton Holland earned the Medal of Honor for action at Chaffin’s Farm and New Market Heights, Virginia.  Holland was born into slavery probably Austin in 1844.  He was the slave and perhaps son of Bird Holland who would later become Texas Secretary of State.  He was freed by Holland in the 1850’s and sent to the Albany Enterprise Academy in Ohio.  He enlisted in the United States Army in 1863 at the age of 19.  He joined the Fifth United States Colored Troops under the command of Gen. Benjamin Butler.   He quickly rose to the rank of regimental sergeant major.  During the engagements at Chaffin’s Farm and New Market Heights all of the white officers were killed or wounded.  Holland assumed command and led his regiment in action as it routed the Confederates.  He was wounded in the battle and for his actions received the Medal of Honor on April 6, 1865.  His commendation contained the following quote regarding his action after the regiment suffered heavy losses in the battle:

 “But, with a courage that knew no bounds, the men stood like granite figures. They routed the enemy and captured the breastworks. The courage displayed by young Holland’s regiment on this occasion called for the highest praise from Gen. Grant, who personally rode over the battlefield in company with Generals Butler and Draper.”

Butler promoted Holland to Captain for his service, but the War Department refused the commission because of his race.  After mustering out of the army on September 20, 1865, Holland lived in Washington, D.C., where he worked in the Auditor Office of the United States government.  He later became chief of collections for the Sixth District. He also established the Alpha Insurance Company, one of the first African-American-owned insurance companies. He died in 1910, at his farm near Silver Springs, Maryland, and was buried at Arlington National Cemetery.

Photo from the National Park Service.

John Cornyn Must Really Hate this Guy

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Sen. Ted Cruz (TP-Texas) continued his assault on Republican leadership yesterday before a nearly empty Senate chamber.  Cruz seemed desperate to vent on the GOP powers that be as part of his flagging “outsider” campaign for President.  The focus yesterday was the GOP’s failure to defund Planned Parenthood and block the Iran treaty. Cruz was practically frothing and at times, it was very hard to tell who Cruz hates more – Pres. Obama or the GOP leadership.  But that is so often the case with the professional Haters such as Cruz.  In contrast, Red thinks that it is becoming perfectly clear that Sen. John Cornyn and other stalwarts of the GOP in Congress likely hate Cruz with a white hot passion that far exceeds their loathing of Obama.  The Texas Tribune has the full story on Cruz’s latest diatribe.

In an hour-long speech on a nearly empty Senate floor that ended when he could not gain permission to continue, the state’s junior senator and presidential hopeful expanded his usual criticisms of Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky., to include outgoing House Speaker John Boehner. Cruz also lambasted fellow Texas U.S. Sen. John Cornyn, spoke of the recent lunar eclipse and boasted of a puzzling personal role in law enforcement.

“Speaker Boehner faced a conundrum,” Cruz said of Boehner’s abrupt decision to step down. “If he does what he and McConnell promised, which is funding all of Barack Obama’s priorities, he would have lost his job.” 

“And so what did he do?” Cruz asked. “He announced he’s resigning as speaker and resigning as a member of Congress.” 

He also took aim at his colleague from Texas, Majority Whip Cornyn. Dozens of times, he questioned the integrity of “Republican leadership,” a reference that includes Cornyn in his capacity as the second-ranking Senate Republican. 

He specifically called out Cornyn, along with a handful of other senior Republican senators, for voting down a Cruz amendment targeting funding for Planned Parenthood and the Iran nuclear weapons deal via voice vote. 

In contrast, Cruz cast himself and conservative senators and House members who frequently vote with him as the only elected members performing their jobs with the will of the American public in mind.  

The speech lasted until his colleagues refused to extend his allotted time. Along the way, Cruz made several pop culture references — the Sunday night lunar eclipse, the movie “The Terminator” and the novel “Brave New World” — not an altogether unimaginable departure from his marathon 2013 speech two years ago which included a reading of “Green Eggs and Ham.” 

He also claimed the mantle of the badge: 

“I’m an alumnus of the U.S.  Department of Justice,” he said. “I was an associate deputy attorney general. I spent much of my adult life working in law enforcement.” 

Cruz served in that position for six months, according to his online LinkedIn.

Red will sleep more soundly at night now that he knows Chief Assistant Deputy Constable Trainee, Part-time Dog Catcher and Self-Proclaimed Piece Officer Ted Cruz is on the job.  Canada’s loss is our gain. And Red knows how to spell Peace, just in case you were wondering.