Tag Archives: Coronavirus

Brother Trump’s Traveling Salvation Show

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As Red has acknowledged, Trump is without doubt the greatest con man who has ever walked the face of the earth.  But as Red has also acknowledged it is hard to keep the con going for the long haul.  In presidential terms, the long haul is anything beyond the first six months or so.

Trump’s cons on the American people have been extensive.  In no particular order he has conned a good portion of Americans into believing: (1) his massive tax cut was not an enormous give back to the wealthiest among us and would benefit the middle class; (2) we are winning trade wars that would benefit working Americans; (3) Russia did not interfere in the 2016 election to help him get elected; (3) our military was in a shambles until Trump took over; (4) he is a self-made man who received a mere pittance of a $1 million loan from his father when he actually inherited more than $400 million in current dollars; (5) he is an expert on the military, science, climate change, foreign policy, economics and any other subject that happens to come up; (6) North Korea is no longer a threat; (7) Ukraine intervened to attempt to get Hillary elected; (8) it was a perfect telephone call; (9) he has drained the “swamp” in DC; (10) he is an extremely stable genius.

But now we have entered in what can only be called the “Snake Oil” phase of Trump’s Reality TV Show Joke of a Presidency.  Faced with a real crisis, Trump clearly has no plan of action.  He lurches from moment to moment falling prey to whatever the Fox or OAN talking heads are saying.  First it was hydroxychlorquine that would be the miracle cure all that would rid of the scourge of COVID-19.  Hallelujah Brother!  Then it was a combination of that chemical with a Z-Pack that cure what ails us.  Can I get an Amen? Then it was that the virus would just magically disappear in April. A Miracle Cure Indeed!  But the latest and greatest of Trump’s con on America is something that would make even the most jaded con man blush.  We can now be healed and brought back to vitality simply by injected ourselves with disinfectant and somehow lighting up our insides.  Wash Me Clean Sister!  Red is reeling in the pure ecstasy of Trump’s divine revelation.  Red will be retiring to his private tanning bed and mainlining some Mr. Clean.

But seriously folks, Trump is nothing more than a pure Snake Oil salesman.  He isn’t traveling anymore but he has his own reality TV show.  But if this latest utter farce does not reveal Trump as the dishonest huckster that he is and always has been – there is no hope for us.   If you are still considering voting for this piece of walking human filth in November – you are an IDIOT.  There is no other way to put it.

 

Quote for the Day

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“We’ll gradually bring those people back and see what happens. Some of them will get sick, some may even die, I don’t know.”

Dick Kovacevich, a current executive at Cisco and Cargill.

Dick is certainly doing all he can to live up to his name.  Tell you what Dick, let’s send some people diagnosed with COVID-19 over to your house for dinner and “see what happens.”

Let Lieutenant Dan be the First in Line

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Red admits he was conflicted by the rolling shutdown of businesses in Texas and throughout the country.   First it was Austin,  Dallas and then San Antonio issuing shelter-in-place orders.  But when Waco  and McClennan County officials announced a closure of all non-essential businesses, Red began to realize that we are in some seriously deep doo doo with this COVID-19 crisis in Texas.   When the heart of Texas and the heart of Texas conservatism (sorry Tarrant County – you’re getting kind of squishy) is taking this matter seriously, then something is really up.  Red doesn’t not pretend to be privy to the expert medical advice given to such officials, but if Waco is shutting down then the reports must be ominous.

Our Poor Idiot Governor Greg Abbott (and don’t take particular offense at this characterization as, in Red’s humble opinion, Abbott is just one in an almost continuous line of OPIG’s dating back to at least whoever came after Alan Shivers) has refused to do much of anything other than close schools and mumble something about gatherings of more than 10 people.  Even worse, Abbott has laughably claimed that he likes to defer to local authorities in such times of crisis.  Curious, how he and the GOP controlled legislature have repeatedly railed against local authorities when they have addressed relatively minor issues like plastic bag bans, tree protection ordinances and some more important ones like fracking bans.  His message has consistently been “I love local government – except when it goes against my right-wing Trumpian dogma.” But now it’s- “Hey, local guys you do what you think is right so that I can have my political cover come next election and say I didn’t destroy the Texas economy – it was all those local Democrats who overreacted.”  It must be tough to maintain a straight face . . .

And speaking of overreaction, here is Red’s take on the issue.  We will never know if the current measures being adopted were needed or effective.  Or at least there will never be an admission from the opponents of such measures that the a general shut down prevented thousands or perhaps millions of deaths.  If such shut-downs stop the spread of the virus, it would seem there is no real way to actually measure the effectiveness of such measures – other than maybe compare us to Italy or Spain.  Red did not do well in probability and statistics and will leave that to others.

However, if the naysayers get their way – maybe we will be able to tell if they were right or wrong.  If we all just go back to normal shoulder-to-shoulder daily life and work and play and COVID-19 kills off no more of us than might bite it in a typical bad flu season, then one could rightfully argue that a shut-down was not needed.  But here’s the kicker – if the let’s’-just-keep-rolling-along-as-if-this-is-no-big-deal crowd is wrong, really wrong, then the consequences could be catastrophic.  This is life and death folks – who wants to gamble?

Okay, so back to the real point of this little diatribe.  This morning Red awoke to the pronouncement of Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick that our senior citizens should be willing to go down taking one in the gut (or the lungs as the case may be) in order for their grandchildren to have a fully functioning economy.  Red will let Lt. Dan speak for himself here.

No one reached out to me and said, ‘As a senior citizen, are you willing to take a chance on your survival in exchange for keeping the America that all America loves for your children and grandchildren?’ And if that’s the exchange, I’m all in. And that doesn’t make me noble or brave or anything like that.

I just think there are lots of grandparents out there in this country like me … that what we all care about and what we all love more than anything are those children.  And I want to, you know, live smart and see through this, but I don’t want to see the whole country to be sacrificed, and that’s what I see.

The message here seems to be pretty clear – Screw the old folks, we’ve got shit to sell.  And as an old man himself, Lt. Dan is taking the supposed high road.  In effect, “I’ll roll the dice because otherwise my political party and career are probably headed for the crapper.”

So while Red was conflicted (remember that’s how this all began), once he heard Lt. Dan’s noble gesture, Red knew that this was a serious problem and that any measures we take should not be half-hearted.  Stay at home as much as possible, wash your hands, maintain “social distance” (we really need a new name for that), enjoy your family, exercise, pull some weeds, have a nice drink, watch some Have Gun Will Travel reruns (highly recommended).  Do the right thing.

And while we are at, Red has some Kool-Aid ready for  Lt. Dan just in case he wants to be the first in line.  Take one for the team buddy!  One potential infection vector down!

P.S. –  On the way in, Red heard right-wing radio bloviator Michael Berry going on about what a crock these shut-downs are – effectively a Commie plot to destroy his beloved Republican Party and force everyone into government servitude.  If Red had any lingering doubts about whether a shut down was the right course of action, hearing Berry’s lying, fear-mongering rant removed any doubt.  A rule that is without exception:  When an utter POS like Berry is against something, it must be the right course of action.

Someone finally came to their senses and guess what, it wasn’t Our Poor Idiot Governor

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Despite repeated warnings, crowds of spring breakers still flooded into South Padre Island earlier this week as our State government did nothing to prevent such mass gatherings.  Our youths were not about to let the fear of COVID-19 stop the partying because – well, their brains are still forming and those judgment regions are still a work in progress.  That’s why sometimes you have to exercise some authority.  Our Poor Idiot Governor took no action and crowds of several thousand SBers were seen at venues across SPI.  Fortunately, some less idiotic heads prevailed and county officials in south Texas banned gatherings of more than 50 people.  This cut down the crowds considerably in the last day or two, but who know if the COVID-19 cow has kicked down the barn door.

Quote for the Day

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“I’m dead right on this.  The coronavirus is the common cold, folks.”

Rush Limbaugh

To be fair to long-time bloated provocateur of right-wing radio, this comment was made last month.  But as Rush is fond of repeatedly telling his audiences, he is completely trustworthy and never wrong.  Of course, that is demonstrably false.  One of Red’s personal favorites was Rush’s repeated and vociferous claim that the Clinton Tax Bill would “destroy the economy.”  Funny how that didn’t work out.  Only the Republicans apparently know how to destroy the economy.  But Red digresses.  More importantly, if you are taking your medical pandemic advice from this purveyor of right-wing propaganda, lies, insults and utter BS, then you are getting what you deserve and you may be “dead right” where you stand.  It’s too bad that you are probably taking down others with you.

Red on Panic Buying

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Red and Mrs. Red went to the local larder on Tuesday night to stock up on a few things.  There wasn’t really panic buying yet, but there were some early signs.  Like the guy in front of Red in line who had snapped up 5 boxes of Whataburger Pancake Mix.  Mrs. Red noticed that he had forgotten the syrup.

But now, panic buying is probably done with for a few days because the shelves have been cleaned out.  This will be good news for the local food banks in a few months as people don’t know what to do with the case of tomato puree and canned potatoes that they bought.

Here’s Red’s simple tip for knowing when panic buying has reached the crazy stage:

WHEN THE LITTLE DEBBIES ARE GONE, THE END TIMES ARE NEAR!

Trump Speaks – Red Translates

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Red translates some excerpts from Trump’s speech to the nation last night.  It was so reassuring that financial markets are now in a complete panic.

My fellow Americans: Tonight, I want to speak with you about our nation’s unprecedented (unprecedented in its incompetence) response to the coronavirus outbreak that started in China and is now spreading throughout the world.
Today, the World Health Organization officially announced that this is a global pandemic (I heard that was bad so I lied about it as long as possible).
We have been in frequent contact with our allies (Putin, Kim Jung Un and Bibi), and we are marshalling the full power of the federal government and the private sector to protect the American people (and more importantly my bottom line).
This is the most aggressive and comprehensive effort to confront a foreign virus in modern history (you know the one that last week I told you would be down to zero cases in a few days). I am confident that by counting and continuing to take these tough measures, we will significantly reduce the threat to our citizens, and we will ultimately and expeditiously defeat this virus (because “I am really good at war”).
From the beginning of time, nations and people have faced unforeseen challenges (like utterly incompetent leadership), including large-scale and very dangerous health threats. This is the way it always was and always will be (some live, some die, some get rich in the process). It only matters how you respond, and we are responding with great speed and professionalism (working on a time machine actually)
Our team is the best anywhere in the world (Be Best!). At the very start of the outbreak, we instituted sweeping travel restrictions on China and put in place the first federally mandated quarantine in over 50 years. We declared a public health emergency (which I pooh-poohed) and issued the highest level of travel warning on other countries as the virus spread its horrible infection.
And taking early intense action, we have seen dramatically fewer cases of the virus in the United States than are now present in Europe (aka our former Allies).
After consulting with our top government health professionals (that’s me in case you were wondering), I have decided to take several strong but necessary actions to protect the health and well being of all Americans.
To keep new cases from entering our shores, we will be suspending all travel from Europe (except countries where my golf resorts are located) to the United States for the next 30 days. The new rules will go into effect Friday at midnight. These restrictions will be adjusted subject to conditions on the ground.
These restrictions will also not apply to the United Kingdom (again – golf resorts).
Earlier this week, I met with the leaders of health insurance industry who have agreed to waive all copayments for coronavirus treatments, extend insurance coverage to these treatments, and to prevent surprise medical billing (in the meantime, I am desperately trying to figure out how to blame this on Obamacare).
We are cutting massive amounts of red tape (also known as scientific protocols) to make antiviral therapies available in record time (wait for the October surprise). These treatments will significantly reduce the impact and reach of the virus.
The vast majority of Americans: The risk is very, very low (really non-existent in my expert medical opinion). Young and healthy people (who unfortunately don’t vote for me) can expect to recover fully and quickly if they should get the virus. The highest risk is for elderly population with underlying health conditions. The elderly population must be very, very careful (and try to stay alive until November so you can vote for me).
Because of the economic policies that we have put into place over the last three years, we have the greatest economy anywhere in the world, by far (it had to come back to me at some point).
Our banks and financial institutions are fully capitalized and incredibly strong. Our unemployment is at a historic low. This vast economic prosperity (boy can I spin the bullshit)  gives us flexibility, reserves, and resources to handle any threat that comes our way (except electing a Democrat).
This is not a financial crisis (I’m an expert on that – see, e.g., my multiple bankruptcies), this is just a temporary moment of time that we will overcome together (please God, before November) as a nation and as a world (you ever notice how when things go wrong, it’s not all about me anymore).
Using emergency authority (and my Article 2 powers to  do whatever I want), I will be instructing the Treasury Department to defer tax payments, without interest or penalties, for certain individuals and businesses (mostly those who don’t need it) negatively impacted. This action will provide more than $200 billion of additional liquidity to the economy (and wouldn’t it be nice if I hadn’t already blown the deficit out of control with my rich guy tax cut).
We are at a critical time in the fight against the virus. We made a life-saving move with early action on China. Now we must take the same action with Europe. We will not delay. I will never hesitate to take any necessary steps to protect the lives, health, and safety of the American people. I will always put the well being of America first (and if you believe that, I have a failed casino to sell you and a bogus University for you to attend and a fake charity for you to contribute to and . . . I could go on for days here really).
If we are vigilant — and we can reduce the chance of infection, which we will — we will significantly impede the transmission of the virus. The virus will not have a chance against us (dramatic music rising in the background – I’m thinking theme from Patton).
No nation is more prepared or more resilient than the United States. We have the best economy, the most advanced healthcare, and the most talented doctors, scientists, and researchers anywhere in the world (and of course the best President – but that goes without saying).
We are all in this together. We must put politics aside, stop the partisanship (cancel the election), and unify together as one nation and one family (scum-sucking Democrats aside).
Our future remains brighter than anyone can imagine (I’ve gotta wear shades). Acting with compassion and love (and no one is more compassionate or loving than me – ask Stormy if you don’t believe me), we will heal the sick, care for those in need, help our fellow citizens (I asked for a picture of Jesus to be smiling at me from above, but they said no), and emerge from this challenge stronger and more unified (behind Trump that is) than ever before.

Typhoid Louie Leads Children Through US Capitol

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Texas Congressman and alleged human being Louie Gohmert (TP-Crazyville) decided against a self-quarantine after being exposed to the coronavirus at the Conservative Political Action Conference last week.  Other Republican lawmakers including Ted Cruz, Mark Meadows, Matt Gaetz, and Doug Collins acted responsibly in deciding to self-quarantine.  But not fearless Louie.  Claiming that he was cleared to work by a “physician” while probably wondering if his lips would be just a bit too far from Trump’s behind if he actually acted prudently, Gohmert has returned to the halls of Congress.

That would be bad enough, but rather than make any attempt to limit exposure to others Gohmert chose instead to lead a group of over 100 children around the Capitol.  Gohmert did claim that he would not shake hands with any of the kids.  His overlord and protector Trump is surely happy.