Tag Archives: Second Amendment

The GOP Solution to Gun Violence – More Guns

Our Poor Idiot Governor Gregg Abbott signed some new guns laws this week.  Texas gun lovers will be glad to know a few new things they can do with their favorite toys:

  1. For a full week after a natural disaster strikes, you can now openly or sneakily carry a handgun.  Before you could only tote around your rifle, shotgun or Chinese made A-47 (When you absolutely, positively got to kill every motherf#(ker in the room – with apologies to Q. Tarentino).  Red supposes this is supposed to allow folks to protect their property from looters.  So great idea here – have a bunch of tired, upset and totally stressed out people who are grieving over the possible loss of family, friends and stuff armed and dangerous and licensed to kill.  What could possibly go wrong?
  2. Landlords can no longer ban guns in their apartment complexes.  Red was once sitting in his friend’s apartment when the gun nuts next door accidentally discharged a .44 through the wall right next to where Red was sitting.  They came running around in a panic with the exclamation, “We f#(ked up, man!” To which Red replied, “No shit!” Apartment walls will not stop a bullet.  The stray one that very nearly took out young Red went through 3 walls.  Brilliant legislating here.
  3. Places of worship will now have to post the standard (and overly complicated) notice to ban guns from their premises.  Red for one can’t wait to attend services at the Holy Ghost House of Prayer and Rifle Range.   Our Father (Bam!), who art in Heaven (Bang!), hallowed be thy Glock (K-zing). Thy Smith&Wesson come (Boom!). Thy will be done on Earth as it is in the holy rifle range (Ackackackackack!).  Give us this day our daily round of ammo (armor piercing please), and forgive us our missed targets (Zing!) as we forgive those who don’t load properly, and lead us not into poor marksmanship (Kboom), but deliver us from Commie gun haters (Bam, Bam!).

The Real Humanitarian and National Security Crisis – Children Killed by Guns

As Individual 1 promotes his “Wall” as the solution to a “growing humanitarian crisis” on the southern border, a real crisis is completely ignored by the Trumpian Party (f/k/a the GOP).  The Houston Chronicle reports that since the beginning of 2018, 23 children in the Houston area have been killed by guns.  Of those 23, at least 7 were accidental shootings resulting primarily from unsecured guns in households.  Others were the result of intentional shootings either directed at the kids or who were killed when someone else was targeted.  Red personally knows of several children who have been accidentally killed by guns left unsecured by adults who should have known better.  Is the price of freedom, the death of children?  Must the tree of liberty be watered with the blood of innocents?  The Second Amendment absolutists apparently find this to be so.

Another Mass School Shooting – This Time in Texas

Red is reposting his remarks made after the Parkland HS shooting earlier this year – because nothing has changed except the location and the names of the dead and injured.  And nothing will change as long as the cowards in Washington (and Austin) stay cowards and do absolutely nothing that might cause the NRA to murmur – “soft on the Second Amendment.”  So Red apologizes if you have read this before.

Red is fairly numb to these events nowadays.  At one point in his life, a mass shooting where 17 [now 10] students and teachers were killed would be an unbelievable tragedy – shaking Red and others to the core.  But these events are so commonplace now that the news cycle moves on rather quickly and Red’s ability to process exactly how deranged our society is diminished and his contempt for the vast majority of our political class is already overloaded.

Here is how it goes. First come the worthless thoughts and well-meaning prayers that will do absolutely nothing to prevent the seemingly inevitable future tragedy that will destroy more lives.  Then the calls for action that will be unheard.  Then the tired old platitudes about a “good guy with a gun” and how now is not the time . . .   Then the calls for legislation that go nowhere.  Then the claims of political opportunism.  Then slow fade to black – until the next time.  Rinse and repeat.  Always repeat.

Please spare Red from more demagoguery about your precious rights.  He grew up in the shadow of the worst mass shooting (up to that point) in U.S. history.  The 1966 UT Tower massacre now pales in comparison to what occurs on a monthly basis all across the U.S.  How many would have died that hot August day if there had been easy access to a semi-automatic with a bump stock.  If you think owning an AR-15 just so that you can have fun shooting on the range is more important than the lives of 17 [10] students and teachers in Florida [Texas] then you should get in your car, drive to Florida [Santa Fe, Texas] and have the courage to face those families and say “So sorry about your child, but you see shooting one of these weapons is just so much damn fun, that it would be horrible to have that right taken away from me.  Again, too bad about your dead kid. Thoughts and prayers, y’all!”

And spare Red the empty words from the White House [or Our Poor Idiot Governor] about being there for the victims and their families.  You are not there. You will not be there.  You will not propose legislation.  You will not tighten controls.  You will not provide for more mental health services.  You will not support background checks.  You will not support a ban on automatic weapons. You will pander to your base.  You will run scared from the NRA.  You will claim a righteous defense of the Second Amendment.   You will do nothing because when it comes right down to it you are a cowardly bully [piece of walking human filth].

The Only Answer Republicans Have – More Guns!

Image: Donald Trump

Something seems different this time.  Maybe it is because of the articulate and formerly somewhat carefree students at Marjory Stoneman Douglas HS like Sam Zeif, Chris Grady, Jose Iglesias and Isabella Pfeiffer to name a few.  Maybe it is because they are getting support from their parents and the community to try to make a difference this time.  Maybe it is because people are truly scared.   Maybe it because Americans are fed up with legislators running scared from the NRA.  Maybe it is because enough is finally enough.  Maybe it is because they are tired of hearing the one and only answer that comes from the bought and paid for GOP weasels  in Congress and State Legislatures (and clearly some Democratic weasels as well to be fair).  And that answer is as always – WE NEED MORE GUNS!.

That is what our Reality TV Show Sick Joke of a President proposed again yesterday with his preposterous plan to arm teachers.  Only a complete fool could believe that having a gun in classrooms with our children is a good idea.   Teachers across the nation have responded to Trump’s proposal with scorn, disbelief and derision.

Red supports more safety measures for schools.  Sadly, we may need metal detectors and secure perimeters around our schools and we may need trained and armed licensed peace officers at every school.  We need to severely restrict access to semi-automatics the same way we have done for automatic weapons since the 1930’s.  We need background checks.  We need mental health services. We do not need guns in the classroom.

We don’t need a President who has kowtowed to the gun lobby by rolling back a regulation that would have added people who are getting Social Security disability for mental problems to the list for background checks, who purged about 500,000 fugitives from the ATF list and changed the definition of fugitive to only include someone who has crossed state lines to avoid arrest under an outstanding warrant,  who revoked a ban on lead ammo in federal wildlife refuges and made it easier for people to carry guns on public lands, who has proposed cutting millions of dollars from the national background check system.  We need a President who doesn’t need notes (see photo) to instruct him on how to behave like a normal compassionate human being.  We need lots of people with the courage to stand up to the gun lobby and say that finally “enough is enough.”

Unfortunately, Red doesn’t really think that this time will be different.  A guy can hope though.

America’s True Love Affair

It wasn’t always this way.  You used to have a rifle and maybe a shotgun for hunting.  Some folks had a pistol – usually a revolver.  Boys had a .22 to shoot bottles and vermin.  Maybe a few guys bought a gun that their wife didn’t know about and hid it in the attic. A few “collectors” had some rare pieces. You might have some extra ammo around.  No one had an arsenal.  No one kept 1000’s of rounds of ammunition in their garage or basement.  Some men and a goodly number of women liked owning a gun, but it didn’t go much beyond that.

Somewhere that changed.  Red can’t exactly pinpoint it, but maybe it was in the late 70’s that the gun lust started to build.

After college, Red was living in an apartment up in Northwest Hills with his friend Tom.  He didn’t own a gun, but there were some fairly well-to-do country boys who lived next door.  Red thinks they were taking the 5.5 year route to a degree at UT and enjoying their time in Austin before heading back to God knows where.  Tom was much friendlier with these guys than Red who was working pretty hard to make ends meet.  But when Red would go over to visit, the guns were always out.  And as Tom put it, these boys wouldn’t just handle their guns – it was like they were fondling them.  You almost expected them to put their lips up to a .45 and give it a long loving kiss.  It was a love affair. Red’s not sure but between the three of them, they probably had 20-30 weapons in that apartment. You’re probably wondering like Red did at the time, “why so many guns, gentlemen?”  Because other than that, they seemed like fairly normal country boys.  Except for this.  They were virulent racists.  As they more or less indicated, they were armed to the teeth because at almost any moment “the niggers in East Austin” were sitting there plotting how they were going to rise up, sweep into Northwest Hills (or any other white part of town) raping, pillaging, killing, looting and most importantly stealing all the guns.  They weren’t about to let that happen to their little corner of the world.

This was the first time Red encountered true naked gun lust.  Yes many of his friends had guns, but Red did not at the time.  Red’s daddy had been through the worst of it as a medic and ambulance driver in a battalion aid station in France, Belgium and Germany in WWII. Red could only guess at how many wounded and dying soldiers he had seen.  He wanted nothing to do with guns or hunting.  He did let Red have .22 and shoot bottles out at the ranch, but that was about it.

But still, the gun lust in Red started to grow.  He started hunting in his 30’s and found that it was an enjoyable experience.  Not so much the shooting and taking of game, but the outdoors experience and camaraderie.  And everyone had a nice deer rifle but Red.  So he bought one and then a shot gun and then he wanted more and more.  The lust was taking hold.  When Lil’ Red came of hunting age, he got a rifle and a shot gun (both nicer than Red’s by the way).  But was that enough.  The lust was strong and Red couldn’t even tell where it came from.  It made no sense really. Red believed that there should be some restrictions on gun ownership, that nobody needed a semi-automatic weapon or stockpiles of ammo, that there should not be loopholes for background checks and that some other ideas might be useful as well. Yet, the creeping lust was there. Red would always check out the gun counter at the local sporting goods store and think, “It would be nice to have one of those.”

Finally, Red said enough was enough.  He kept the two hunting rifles and shotguns because they were actually used for hunting and a .357 because his father-in-law gave it to him and sold everything else to someone in whom the lust was still running strong.  Yet, it still makes Red a little proud somewhere deep inside that he is a “gun owner.”

When Dildos are Outlawed only Outlaws will have Dildos

Thousands of UT-Austin students openly carried dildos and other sex toys to class this week in an hilarious protest against Texas’ law requiring public universities to allow open carry of weapons on campus.  Some believed that it might have been the largest anti-gun protest in Texas history.   The open display of the faux penises disturbed some. But as one protestor, Rosie Zander, put it, If you’re uncomfortable with dildos, how do you think I feel about your gun?” And just where did the students get all of the fake phalluses –  it turns out they were donated by purveyors of sex toys ranging from local sellers in Austin all the way to Singapore.

Red wonders what Ted Cruz – once a prominent supporter of Texas Anti-Dildo Law thinks about all this.

Quote for the Day

Hillary wants to abolish, essentially abolish the Second Amendment. By the way, and if she gets to pick her judges, nothing you can do, folks. But the Second Amendment people, maybe there is, I don’t know.”

Donald Trump

Donald wants to impose a religious test for immigration, give a huge tax break to the wealthiest Americans, reinstate torture as national policy, give up on NATO, use tactical nuclear weapons, target children of terrorists, and abolish the First, Fifth, Eighth and Fourteenth Amendments.  By the way, and if gets elected, nothing you can do folks.

But the knife-wielding maniac people, maybe there is, Red doesn’t know.

And the Texas Chainsaw Massacre people, maybe there is, Red doesn’t know.

And the Walking Dead people, maybe there is, Red doesn’t know.

And the Vampire people, maybe there is, Red doesn’t know.

Not to mention the hateful and vengeful Democrats, maybe there is, Red doesn’t know.

And if the Secret Service is reading – Hey, Red’s just saying, you know anything could happen and is referring solely to organized political action by the knife-wielding maniacs coalition for example.  Who by the way are quite the political force Red hears.