Category Archives: Uncategorized

Can Sid “Cupcake” Miller Possibly be as Stupid as he Appears?

So Sid manages to offend the depressed, suicide counselors, Pakistanis andpretty much anyone with a sense of decency all in one fell swoop.  You have to be a special kind of moron to do that – almost a moron savant it would seem.  Sid’s 10 gallon hat holds about a half-pint of brains and 9.9 gallons of excrement passing for cerebral matter (aka “shit for brains”).

Today in Texas History – November 30

From the Annals of the Southern Rebellion – In 1864, Rebel commander Hiram B. Granbury was killed at the Battle of Franklin, Tennessee.  The battle was a near-complete disaster for the Rebel forces under the command of John Bell Hood and they lost more soldiers in that battle than in any other one-day battle of the entire war.  The loss was not quite the end for Rebel forces in Tennessee as that came shortly afterwards at Nashville.

Granbury was born in Mississippi and graduated from Oakland College. In the 1850’s Granbury moved to Waco where he was admitted to the Texas State Bar and served as chief justice of McLennan County.  After secession, Granbury recruited the Waco Guards and was elected by the troops as Major.

On February 15, 1862, he was captured with his command at the Battle of Fort Donelson – one of U.S. Grant’s first brilliant victories.   He surrendered and was taken as a POW.  Later that year, the Rebel officers were paroled as part of an officers exchange from prison. Granbury was given an early parole to take care of his terminally-ill wife Fannie.  Granbury returned to service after his parole and was ultimately commissioned brigadier general.

The city of Granbury in Hood County is named for him and a statute of the Rebel leader sits on the Courthouse square.

So is Red honoring Granbury by relating this history?  No, he is stating the known facts.  Are Hood County and the State of Texas honoring Granbury by continuing to have a city named after him and a statute on the Courthouse lawn?  Yes, and Red fully supports taking down such monuments to traitors.  Renaming entire cities is a more difficult proposition that will take some time to deal with.

Red’s NFL Picks – Week 13

Red was a mediocre 3-3 on the straight match-ups last week and is holding his own at 43-29 for the season.  The money line was tough on ol’ Red as he went 2-4 with his bookie.

Answer to last week’s trivia:  From 1923 to 2013, the Packers and Lions have played 22 games on Thanksgiving Day.

This week’s trivia: When was the last scoreless NFL game played and which teams managed to score zero points?

Your Nada Game of the Week: Vikings over Falcons.    Case Keenum could have been a Texan!  In fact he was a Texan – twice and managed to win two games coming in out of the cold to end the season in 2014. And the Texans did not even give him a second look in 2015.  Okay he was bad with the Rams in 2016, but who wasn’t?  Given a chance in Minnesota (because Sam Bradford is a particularly delicate flower – no knock on Sam but that’s the way it is), CK has flourished with 14 TDs, 5 INTs and a 96.7 QB rating.  And meanwhile in Texas, Tom “the Turnover Machine” Savage is playing out the skein with the Texans.  Oh, what could have been.  This week is a big challenge for the Vikings but they look up to it.  Given the firepower of these two offenses, Red likes the over at 47.5. Minnesota 30 Atlanta 27.

Your Zilch Game of the Week: Titans over Texans.  Despite having been clobbered (and that is putting it mildly) by the Texans in Week 4, Red will take the “improved” Titans giving up 7 to the floundering Texans.  Hopefully, Mrs. Red has something planned for Sunday so that Red doesn’t have to watch another whipping.  Tennessee 24 Houston 9.

Your Zero Game of the Week: Eagles over Seahawks.  Red thinks the Eagles walk over the depleted Seahawks and will gladly give up 5 points to any eager Seahawks fan. Eagles overcome the reverse triple time zone, hipster adjustment factor hex and continue their march to a No. 1 playoff seeding in the NFC.  Another loss for Seattle and they still will not be in danger of falling out of playoff contention – mostly because the Panthers or Falcons must lose this week.  Heck, even the Cowboys-OTNAs winner this week will be within striking distance in the NFC.  The Eagles only problem may be clinching the NFC East too soon and relaxing a bit.  Which – all-in-all is not a bad problem to have.   Philadelphia 35 Seattle 21.

Your Zip Game of the Week:  Patriots over Bills.  Why not?  Red has sort of avoided the Pats this season because it just isn’t much fun picking them to win and picking them to lose is – well, usually a losing proposition.  But every team deserves a gander from Red during the season.  Pats top rated offense looks unstoppable right now.  Nothing short of divine intervention would keep them out of the AFC title game but for their pathetic defense.  But this is the era of offense.  Take the over at a hefty 49 – unless the weather looks iffy – then take the under.  New England 31 Buffalo 20.

Your Skunked Game of the Week: Dolphins over Broncos.  A well deserved spot in this week’s Shit Bowl for two failing franchises.  Sometimes there is just no point in analyzing these things.  So Red will simply give the usual warning to hide the Drano, Windex, Tidy-Bowl and Comet lest ye be tempted to mix up a deadly Tequila and house cleaner cocktail at halftime of this doleful dung duel.  That said, Red likes the under even at a lowly 38.5.  Beat that!  Miami 14 Denver 9.

Your Big 0 Game of the Week:  Ravens over Lions.  There is a huuuge difference between 7-5 and 6-6 entering December.  The team that wins this one has a real potential playoff path.  The loser has to count on a lot going wrong for other teams.  Nobody is scoring much on the Ravens right now, so Red likes the under at 40.  Baltimore 17 Detroit 14.

Today in Texas History – November 29

From the Annals of the Methodists –  In 1838, Rev. Jesse Hord entered Texas at Gaines Ferry on the Sabine River.  Hord had volunteered for service in Texas and was assigned to the Texas Mission District by the Methodist Church in October of 1838. In October he traveled by horseback with his fellow missionary Isaac Strickland to Texas.  The day after entering Texas he preached his first sermon at San Augustine.  Hord had converted to Methodism at age 17.  Four years later he was admitted on trial into the Tennessee Conference where he was ordained him a deacon in 1836 and an elder in 1837.  He was charged with forming a circuit in the Houston area and he established the first Methodist congregations at Richmond, Matagorda, Brazoria, Bay Prairie, DeMoss, Texana, Velasco, East Columbia, and Houston. His 500-mile circuit included twenty congregations. He is considered the founder of Methodism in Texas.

Today in Texas History – November 27

Major Land & Water Features - Louisiana

From the Annals of the Borders –  In 1941, the State of Louisiana lost its legal challenge to the eastern border of Texas.  Louisiana claimed that its western boundary extended not to the middle of the Sabine River but to the western bank.  The exact boundary has been the subject of much legal wrangling.

Price Daniel Sr. wrote an informative if somewhat dull history of the boundary dispute for the Southwestern Law Journal.

Red’s NFL Picks – Week 12

Red was 4-2 on the straight up picks.  Red is now a very respectable 40-26 over 11 weeks of the season.  On the money line – let’s just say it was a bad week.  Red’s only winner was taking the Falcons and the points.

Answer to Last Weeks Trivia: On September 21, 1951, Norm Van Brocklin of the LA Rams threw for 554 yards against the New York Titans.

This Weeks Trivia Question:  Which 2 teams have the longest Thanksgiving Day rivalry?

Your Oyster Stuffing Pick of the Week: Chargers over Cowboys.  You can’t quite put a fork in the Cowboys – but you can prod them with your instant read thermometer (highly recommended when you are smoking a Turkey ala Red). Chargers would be in the thick of it having gone 4-2 over the last 6 games.  But then there was that stretch where they lost games to Broncos, Dolphins and Eagles that were all but won.  Their 54 point smack down of the fading Bills last week let everyone know that the Chargers’ offense is back.  Speaking of fading – there is the Dallas defense which (w/o Sean Lee) seems incapable of stopping anything short of a high school team.   The Eagles scored at will in the second half on Sunday in what must have been a richly deserved humiliation for J. Jones and crew.  Chargers score at will until they get tired of winning.  Take the over at 48 if you think the Cowboys can muster two field goals – Red isn’t so sure that they can.  Los Angeles 48 Arlington 10.

Your Cranberry Relish Pick of the Week: Vikings over Lions.  All over Houston, UH fans are saying “I told you so.”  Nothing is more offensive to Red’s ears than happy UH fans.  Nonetheless, Red must give CK his props.  Will the magic continue this week?  This could be your NFL GAME OF THE WEEK.  Vikings are giving up 3.  Take it.  Minnesota 29 Detroit 24.

Your Pecan Pie Pick of the Week: Texans over Ravens –  Texans showed signs of the Savage Life in last week’s win over the hapless and hospitalized Cards.  Tom is not Terrific but neither is he Terrible.  He is a mediocre back up QB on a mediocre team whose defense has been crippled by loss of Watt, Mercilus and Cushing.  Ravens have skunked two bad offenses so far this season (Dolphins and Rodgersless Packers).  Texans have to put points on board early.  They have enough speed and Savage has enough arm to put up some big plays if only there would be time to throw deep.  There won’t be.  Texans are getting 7.5 and that looks tempting but Red is taking the Over at 38.  Houston 21 Baltimore 20.

Your Candied Yams Pick of the Week: Chiefs over Bills.  Two fading teams face off in a lackluster matchup.  Red is almost too bored to pick this game.  He is too bored to say anything more about it.  Chiefs giving up 10 at home looks tempting against a completely lost Bills squad.  KC 35 Orchard Park, NY 14.

Your Gravy Pick of the Week:  Rams over Saints –  Red happened to be in the Crescent City last Sunday and seriously thought about attending the game but he already had enough football watching Tulane push around UH on Saturday despite being slower smaller and more intelligent.  On Sunday, Red estimates that more than half of New Orleans residents out on the street or in a bar watching the game were either wearing Saints gear or dressed in black and gold (e.g. black top and leggings and gold lame miniskirt).  Saints’ fans are passionate about their team in a way that is probably unmatched outside of Wisconsin, Seattle and Pittsburgh.  Saints were all but left for dead last Sunday (see below) and somehow managed to win.  They are either the team of destiny in the NFC (the Eagles may have something to say about that) or they have peaked too early.  It’s hard to say.  On the other had, the Rams are coming off of their worst game of the season  after getting smoked by C. Keenum and Co. in the frozen hinterlands.  The Rams have bounced back from every loss this season – but this one requires a helluva bounce.  Red is counting on the double reverse time zone inverse humidity index hex in this one.  The Rams are getting 2.5 at home.  That’s not enough for a betting man! And the O/U is a hefty 53.  If Red were forced to bet he might take over.  Rams 30 Saints 27.

Your Turkey Pick of the Week:  Giants over OTNAs – OTNAS are reeling from last week’s OT loss to the Saints in a game that (with about 4 minutes left) they had a 99.6% statistical chance of winning.  K. Cousins and crew had a look of utter disbelief that they had blown this game and a chance to get a leg up on NFC Wildcard rivals.  Teams either bounce back from such ignominious defeats or the fold up like a pup tent.  This week will show what the OTNAs are made of – and its cheap canvas.  The Giants aren’t nearly as bad as their record shows – but they are bad enough to secure this game as the week’s Shit Bowl.  But an entertaining Shit Bowl that might even rouse Red from his dopamine drowsiness on Thursday night just in time to watch the Giants rally and defeat the OTNAs in OT.  Nonetheless, prudence requires Red to warn all to keep that turkey leg and carving knife locked up lest ye be tempted to carve the leg into a shiv and plunge it into your femoral artery sometime before half time of this doleful doo-doo doubling.  Red (and he can’t believe he is saying this) likes the over at 44.5.   New Jersey 26 Landover, MD 20.

Donald Trump on Al Franken and Roy Moore and Donald Trump

Donald Trump can’t quite keep his reaction to the various sexual scandals straight,  Red wonders what could possibly be the distinction?

According to Trump:

Al Franken(stein) –  who has admitted the allegation of one women who was the recipient of an unwanted and forceful French kiss and on the butt-end of an improper prank photo taken while on a comedy tour for troops in Iraq –  is a low-life degenerate, scum sucking women abuser who should be tarred, feathered and run out of the capital building on a rail.

Roy Moore – twice disgraced former Chief Justice of the Alabama Supreme Court who has been the subject of seemingly credible allegations that he was a serial pedophile who illegally served alcohol to and molested teenage girls and was banned from the Gadsden Mall because he was out cruising for jail bait  –  Let the voters of Alabama decide.

Donald Trump – accused by more than a dozen women of sexual assault of various types and caught on tape admitting that he sexually assaulted women –  Every one of  those bitches are LIARS who will be SUED!

Texas Sheriff – Ignorant of the Law but Looking for Trump Hater

Fort Bend County Sheriff Troy E. Nehls doesn’t know much about the law if he thinks that he can lawfully arrest someone for posting a “FUCK TRUMP” sign on their truck. Nehls stated that he was looking for the owner of the truck after he received several complaints about the display from unhappy people.

The Republican Sheriff who is reported to fancy a run for higher office posted a picture of the truck with the message  – “If you know who owns this truck or it is yours, I would like to discuss it with you. Our Prosecutor has informed us she would accept Disorderly Conduct charges regarding it, but I feel we could come to an agreement regarding a modification.”

The truck’s owner is having none of it and appears to be hiding in plain sight.  Karen Fonseca, wife of the truck’s owner, told the Houston Chronicle that they would not be removing the sign and that “It’s just our freedom of speech and we’re exercising it.”

The U.S. Supreme Court would appear to have the Fonsecas back.  In the case of Cohen v. California, the Supreme Court overturned a the conviction for disturbing-the-peace of Cohen after he’d gone to a courthouse in Los Angeles wearing a jacket that said “Fuck the Draft.”

Today in Texas History – November 16

From the Annals of the Treaties –  In 1845, the Republic of Texas signed its final Indian treaty. The agreement came at the end of the Tehuacana Creek Councils, which had commenced in the spring of 1843.  Pioneer Jesse Chisholm had worked to convince a number of Indian groups, including the Caddos, Tawakonis, Delawares, Lipan Apaches, and Tonkawas, to meet on the Tehuacana Creek near the Torrey Brothers trading post south of Waco.

The next council met at Fort Bird on the Trinity River in the fall of 1843. These councils resulted in a peace treaty between the Republic and the Wacos and Caddos.  The failure to reach an accord with the Comanche caused President Sam Houston to call another council to meet at Tehuacana Creek in April 1844.  The Comanche were yet again missing.  In October 9, 1844, Houstonnegotiated a treaty with a part of the southern Comanche, Kichais, Waco, Caddos, Anadarkos, Hainais, Delawares, Shawnees, Cherokees, Lipan Apaches, and Tawakonis. At the November 1845 council the Wacos, Tawakonis, Kichais, and Wichitas agreed to the treaty of October 9, 1844.  The Comanche continued fighting for another 30 years.